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That’s the old world. This is the new world. With killer bugs and aliens and zombies.

That’s all the evidence I need. Mizzou is winning the championship, boys. Prepare yourselves.

History is all they’ve got.

Stop making them sound good. It’s only four times in the last 15 years that they have finished above .500.

So what you’re saying is I should buy tickets for the national championship game.

They never stopped cheating. They stopped being good at it.

-Australia catches fire -WW3 almost starts with Iran and North Korea -Kobe Bryant dies in a helicopter crash -Tom Brady and Rob Gronkowski leave the Patriots -Trump impeached -Surprise virus gives Earth an RKO outta nowhere -All sports canceled -The world gets put into quarantine -Kim Jong Un...

Think he has ever been in a Turkish prison?

Let’s not forget those Oregon State sports bra uniforms.

The Mizzou banana uniforms

Well maybe if they had learned it they wouldn’t all be dead now. ‘Merica.

Spoiler alert, asshole.

Top of the Rock in Branson: The James River which runs about a mile from the house.

Yes.

Get rid of the Kansas emoji you bitch.

Nice try, FBI.